WHAT I REALLY WANTED by Donald L. Simons

I felt from an early age that I was being lied to, was being betrayed.  But by whom?  By what?  At the same time, I felt myself a lie.  When I opened my mouth, I did not know who it was that was speaking.  I spent years in the university, which I argued to myself was worth the effort.  It was stimulating intellectually, and entertaining even, but of what use was it in the end?  It left me with the real question, what is worthwhile doing?  What I really wanted was salvation. Seek out your own salvation with diligence the Buddha said.  Try it, see for yourself.  He  said that you can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of salvation than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere.  When we are suffering, we are as much in need of our compassion as is any other being, and we are equally deserving of it. In the end, only the individual can attain his own salvation.  ...